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painting the dead plants green

by Randall Kirk Jones

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1.
solipsism overcast doomscroll down the past driving forward like a baby in a car seat looking back caught in the holding pattern again so if I could take one thing from this burning house I would take the fire away lemon bread wedding baby's breath this bird lives in a shoebox cardboard nest the magnolia foot tattoo erased dragging my feet slow to embrace times wiping water off my face caught in the holding pattern again so if I could take one thing from this burning house I would take the fire away
2.
demon on my shoulder I shake off again like a bird in a birdbath trying to get clean seems there's nothing to hold to so we grab at the neck of anything free a body with a soul or the other way around we're a pair of synchronized divers twirling and somersaulting through the air til' we dive deep under the water headfirst into whatever's under there a body with a soul or the other way around
3.
out of sight, out of my mind diverting rivers to reach the other side dust in sunbeam retreat into daydream praying one day paper time will fold changer, destroyer rebirth each moment so much, so little control over where it goes unseen transformer moving this forward if for no good reason than to see just where it goes data lake windburnt to live without my heart is a cake cut and hand pieces out the underlying reason again that I find watching the wilting sprouting live and die changer, destroyer rebirth each moment so much, so little control over where it goes unseen transformer moving this forward if for no good reason than to see just where it goes
4.
watching Bob from the balcony back row bluebonnets on the on ramp on my way home bedroom across from a cemetery bus stop gravestones contrast time-lapse traffic pass me by how many memories am I the only one to carry on drinking water to put out the fire in my brain Orion's Arms around my neck 'til all I see are faint billion year old stars circling endless black space abyss eye contact love will pull me back I am painting the dead plants green can't dip your foot in the same river water twice brain fog day long ephemeral time sucked away how many memories am I the only one to carry on so Jenna will you unplug the heater Portland spring snow Willamette River are you sure you should drink on that new medication fall asleep with our jackets on
5.
lake 00:48
6.
dug tunnels through time I left parts of me behind to find long buried memories I step on like landmines insects in the nighttime the smell of books I've had my whole life the way the ladle in the sauce is stirred the howling of the grocery store parking lot birds and I wanna hoard these memories but they're water down the shower drain appearing from somewhere that I can't see pass through me and gone time washing me clean and it feels like when we met we were picking up right where we left off and I wonder if we do this every lifetime many hundreds now forgot leave my window open just to feel some connection to these strangers outside watching the past with kaleidoscope fly vision gravity pushing harder when I'm alone and I wanna hoard these memories but they're water down the shower drain appearing from somewhere that I can't see pass through me and gone time washing me clean through me and gone pass through me and gone through me and gone pass through me and gone through me and gone time washing me clean
7.
window unit 02:31
stepping on the same rakes time and again burn the midnight oil just to burn something so throw the old bricks of the prison into the sea have who I want to be wrap his arms around the me that I tend to be the barrel of a wave or the barrel of a gun barreling either way toward I don't know what each second four come in two taken out humming machines in the house we all block out thread coming loose on the sweater knit the air conditioning window unit if you're looking, so much beauty I don't know what to do with it
8.
cartwheel 02:37
infinite arms in a generational cartwheel tumbling through time never to see the whole thing through first open eyes upside down halfway mid-cartwheel in the space of an eyeblink hail mary what it is I think the unknown is dwindling now nothing you can't measure dust ever rearranged we form dissolve transform again stories shape the unformed clay of chaos context a box light enough to hold what was water through my hands the unknown is dwindling now nothing you can't measure dust ever rearranged we form dissolve transform again
9.
lived underwater my whole life pressure compounding tried to give up my worries made me careless I'd like a few back that are gone crash land into the present again now butterflies push dominoes that fall forever winding rows that wind from wind and wing giving the future form crash land into the present again how did you not know that it would wilt away and almost die how did you not know gilded lilies can't survive can't survive
10.
deathless 03:31
somehow tethered caught up again in the spiritual lost and found holding 'til the shoulders finally fall bug eyed lily white to eigengrau quiet camera voyeur with no voice beneath layers is being's passive ever-present joy and us like the song which knows it cannot end without silence I guess what makes a garden is its fences it's feckless, no endless sprawling meadow deathless staring at the sun hoping that it blinks while rosemary hands hold mortal uncoiling and us like the song which knows it cannot end without silence

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recorded on Tascam 8 track, November 2022 - January 2023

randy- guitar, vocals, flute, piano, shaker (lemon pepper and quinoa)

produced by randy

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released March 20, 2023

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Randall Kirk Jones Denton, Texas

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